Every executive and entrepreneur should know how to use their soft skills to build high-performing teams. My ASSET framework is all about using soft skills to build stronger personal and professional relationships — and this is the companion to it: a personal framework for developing stronger soft skills, or what some people like to call "power skills." Since I don't have a better name for it, we can call it Sam Cho's Triangle. The outline is actually comprised of four connected triangles.
Emotional Intelligence — the top of the triangle
Starting at the top, having strong Emotional Intelligence (or "EQ") is all about having cognitive and emotional empathy for people and situations. If you're the type of person that struggles with understanding feelings, it might be best to start investing some energy in this area immediately. For practical applications of channeling empathy into your life, look at how empathy serves as a core principle in design thinking.
There is no valid reason to suppress our feelings in any relationship or business strategy. We should remember that we always have a choice in how to respond to any given situation. Plans drawn from rational thought and actions taken for a purpose — instead of mere off-the-cuff reactions — are generally better, because such intentional actions account for risk. By practicing decision-making with empathy, we create time to think about a situation. A highly calibrated, emotionally intelligent person will outperform any other leader by making better decisions, especially in times of distress.
Communication — the left side
On the left, we have communication, which starts with listening. This is a core leadership principle: since situational leadership includes servant leadership, every leader of a community — which includes workplaces, companies, and institutions — should be an excellent listener.
"The first service one owes to others in a community involves listening to them."— Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Have you ever been accused of not listening to someone? Or have you ever felt like the person you were speaking to wasn't listening to you? Exactly. By listening first, we better understand the needs of each other — our customers, companions, companies, and communities.
The other part of communication includes written and spoken language. Word choice in both scenarios is extremely important. The same sentence can mean different things to different people, so it doesn't hurt to have an important e-mail read by another person who thinks differently than you — ask a trusted source how your word choice could be rephrased to reduce ambiguity or confusion. Try taking improv classes to practice quick thinking and sharing your most important thoughts efficiently. If you're worried about an accent — yours or those around you — prepare beforehand by listening to native speakers to better adapt to the conversation. And don't forget: your body language speaks volumes.
Time — the right side
Time is the third component of the framework. Time management — especially accounting for personal time — is the most important element. People often ask how I do everything that I do. Although there are many days (maybe weeks) where I only get 5–6 hours of sleep, I have a habit of doing one thing at a time and giving 100% of my effort to each specific task. I remove myself from distractions and stay laser-focused on the one thing that matters most.
Depending on the environment and the task, I match the soundtrack to the work: non-verbal music like lofi or classical piano for long hauls of research; upbeat EDM or a cappella for analytical data processing; or no music and plain noise cancellation when I really have to concentrate. I also try not to multi-task unless the tasks are strongly correlated with each other.
How you manage your time often translates into the definition of your personal work ethic. When people see how you use your time to produce your results, they start forming their own opinions on whether they can trust your personal output and the outcomes you affect. Find what works for you.
Collaboration — the center of it all
In the center of it all is collaboration. I believe soft skills can be called power skills because having a developed skill set in these areas turns oneself into a powerful collaborator. Living in community with one another — in the workplace, at home, or through volunteering — is all about working with each other to produce positive outcomes for our world.
If everyone spent more time developing their soft skills, our communities would likely evolve into extraordinarily different organisms. If you believe in a world where every leader should embrace these values and principles, join me and invest more time and energy in this space — together.
Although this framework is still a work in progress, the interactive diagram above shows the outline filled in. So what do you think — would you add, replace, or remove anything?